Track Your Happiness

A few weeks back, I listened to a Ted Radio Hour show on happiness.  (I think Ted Radio Hour is my new favorite thing.  Yesterday I listened to another show on Believers and Doubters, which was also interesting, although not as good). Anyway, the happiness one had four great points to make, four things these Ted talkers believed really influence happiness:

• staying in the moment 
• slowing down
• less stuff, and
• gratefulness.

I absolutely loved the challenge toward these four things.  I've since stopped doing things on my phone while also doing other things.  For example, I used to take my phone to read or check email while nursing.  I stopped and I started just staring at my daughter, looking at her chubby little hands and listening to her sweet sighs.  Slowing down is really hard for me, so that'll be one that I have to fight for regularly.  "Less stuff" has been a continual goal for both Isaac and me, and though we regularly donate things to Goodwill, we still have way more than we'd like:  too many clothes we don't use, too many gadgets in our kitchen that only get used once in a blue moon, way too many toys for our girls.  But we'll keep on trying.

My favorite thing said about gratefulness was David Steindl-Rast's idea that we can't be grateful for everything, violence or suffering, but we can always be grateful for the opportunity.  That's been a really interesting challenge.  I'm thankful for the opportunity to wipe my three-year old's gross poopy butt because I know soon enough she won't need me to do much for her.  I'm thankful for the opportunity of someone talking non-stop while I'm trying to get work done because it gives me an opportunity to become a better listener even when I don't want to.

The most lasting effect of listening to this show was that I signed up for a project mentioned called Track Your Happiness. After signing up, I received around three texts everyday for a couple of weeks asking questions about my daily activities.  I answered my last text today and this is what it tracked:

You can zoom in on your browser if you want to see with more detail, but these are some of the things it reports:

• my happiest day is Sunday
• my happiest place is church, with the playground as a close second
• my happiest activities are 
1. praying/worshipping/meditating (it counts them as one)
2. playing
3. playing the piano
4. sleeping

It also tracked things like my happiness depending on how much sleep I got, who I was talking to or how focused I was.  I'm glad the questions are over because it was a bit of a pain to stop and answer questions throughout my day, but I'm glad to have these results.  Of course it wasn't perfectly accurate because self-reported things never are, but it has allowed me to see some things to consider.

If the report says that I'm the least happy when I'm commuting and watching TV, I'd like to seriously consider how far away I decide to live from work and places I will visit often (like church or parks).  I want to fight the urge to veg in front of shows that aren't that funny or interesting in the first place.

I really encourage you to track your happiness, to listen to that Ted Talk, to know yourself better, and to make the difficult choices that make life better.

Awesome and Snot-Filled Parenting

Some time in the fall, I think, my family and I sat on a picnic blanket at the top of Art Hill around sunset, eating sushi.  This guy and his friends walked by, saw us and yelled out, "You guys are awesome!"  And in that moment, we kind of were. Picture a beautiful, dark haired and big eyed five-month old, laying happily on the blanket as her calm and cool mom ate sushi and smiled at her.  Her dad probably looking out at the water ahead, or looking at their three-year-old girl.  That adorable three-year-old, with light brown curls swirling in the wind, attempting to use chop sticks to grab a roll.  We were awesome.

Well, for that guy, who saw us in our most awesome moment, for any of you who see us on Sunday mornings, all dolled-up with cute bows in our hair (well, not Isaac), or all of you who happen to catch up when we're eating at Mission Taco, enjoying a good brew because our perfectly behaved girls are entertained simply by eating their meals without any help, for you I write the following.

Parenting sometimes sucks.  It sucks when that three-year-old doesn't take a nap when she needs it, and I had plans to hang out with a friend while she slept.  She came down the first time because she's pooped in her pull-up, even though we've been practicing pooping in the toilet for almost a year.  Being interrupted is not a big deal, I tell myself, knowing that my friend totally understands, and even though the smell of $h!+ lingers in your kitchen, dining room and living room, it's darling how she said, "It's just, I got a poop."  The second time, though, when she came down for no good reason, well, to tell me that my 11-month-old is crying -- that's right because she's supposed to be napping, too.  I can hear her in the monitor crying on-and-off.  So she came down, the three-year-old, the second time to inform me of an annoying fact that I already knew.  While frustrated, I begin to feel slightly guilty, as if I'm so selfish wanting them to sleep only so I can be alone with my friend.  Guilt begins to take over and I begin to wonder if I put them to bed too early just because I wanted to get rid of them, even though I put them down at their normal nap time, that's why I'd scheduled the hang out at that time.  But maybe I rushed the bedtime process and my little one didn't nurse enough, even though that's not the case because she clearly didn't want anymore before I put her down.  Or my three year old doesn't feel seen or valued, even though I read her a book and held her before putting her down).

I ended up taking my three-year-old to bed a third or fourth time - I lost count - coming downstairs and crying, while my sweet friend prayed for me, while snot ran down my face.

At this point, I began to wonder, where's the guy from the park to tell me I'm awesome?

Your life is now!

I was recently told to stop waiting for [fill in the blank for whatever you are waiting for - spouse, baby, job, career path, etc] for my life to start. "Your life is now!" Cindy told me and she's been the voice in my head for over a month.  I was really convicted about walking like a victim, captive to an unknown future. I wanted to wait until things were more certain, more comfortable to take action. But that may never be!

So... I've started running a bit (walk/runs, really). That doesn't really have much to do with my future, but I feel great, and I've decided to run my first 5K.  I was thinking as I ran today, whatever the future holds, I'm gonna try to be in good health for it. 

I'm also becoming increasingly interested in diversity... what should I call it, not training, more like experiences. And when I say interested, I mean that after a meeting the other day discussing a possible diversity leadership institute and possible future conversations with educators, students and parents, I drove home exhilarated! I want to be a part of this movement, of a people willing to have difficult conversations in pursuit of reconciliation and healing. 

And lastly, I'm gonna do a scary thing and look at shifting careers. Slowly. But I've gotta start now. 

Preparing for Easter

UPDATE: After just two days of following this reading plan, I realized that it just goes through the whole story book. That's nice, but it's not what I expected. I thought it would be a specific preparing for Easter kind of reading plan. Oh well. I'll keep looking, or I might make my own at some point.

Our church gave us the Jesus Biblestory Book when we dedicated Sofia and then another copy when we dedicated Anabel. It's amazing and regularly makes Isaac cry when I'm reading it to Sofia.  During Christmas time I saw this advent reading plan to go along with this Biblestory Book, so I thought I'd go looking for one for Easter. I found this one, but it had all of last year's dates, so I made my own (below) with this year's dates. I'm excited to read with Sofia and maybe do some crafts.

Drafted and forgot to publish: December 21, 2013

2:30pm - car is packed.
2:50pm - dead car battery.
4pm - new battery, picked up girls and on the road.
5:30-6:30pm - nonstop screams from Anabel.
6:45pm - Anabel asleep,

Sofia: "Mom, birds don't have mouths."
Me: "No, mi amor, los pájaros tienen picos."
Sofia: "But I don't have a pico."
Me: "No porque vos no sos un pájaro, sos una nena."
Sofia: "No, I'm a dog."

7-8:30pm - peaceful driving.
8:30-9pm - dead stopped traffic on an already single lane highway.
9:30pm - on the road again.

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